Potty training doesn't have to be a power struggle if everyone is on the same page and the ownership is placed on the child - it is her body after all. For successful potty training there are two key components. First you have to be ready to commit to the process. It doesn't happen over night and if you are not ready to deal with the accidents and stick with it then you shouldn't start. Starting and stopping when it is convenient for you will send mixed messages and be confusing for your child.
Secondly your child needs to be ready too. This includes both physically and emotionally. Signs of this will include dry diapers for extended periods of time during the day, an interest in using the potty, cooperation and the ability to control their bowel and bladder muscles (having bowel movements around the same time each day, not having bowel movements at night, and having a dry diaper after a nap.) Children must also be able to climb, talk, remove clothing, and have mastered other basic motor skills before they can use the toilet by themselves.
If your child is resistant then do not force the issue. This will only result in power struggles, which we all know never end well for any of the interested parties. More importantly, forcing the issue can result in serious medical complications as a result of holding such as dysfunctional voiding, UTIs and encopresis, a serious condition where the muscles in the colon lose the ability to function normally due to over stretching from holding. This will result in fecal incontinence.
Bottom line is that not every child will become potty trained at the same age and it is a process not a struggle. Some kids will also need more time for bowel control than bladder control. And even after your child is potty trained there will continue to be accidents so always keep a spare pair of clothes on hand and some patience.